You’ve been told your whole life that you need to be honest with people. However, you’ve also seen how sensitive some people are as well as how petty they can be when their told the truth. Regardless of the fact that you’re discovering your Perfect Circle you don’t need to have people viewing you in a negative light.
The simplest way, by far, to get your point across when it comes to letting someone go is by spending some time doing what you enjoy. It shouldn’t surprise you that the people you want to let go off are the ones you feel don’t share the same interests as you. Spend more time doing what you enjoy and if they don’t enjoy it eventually you’ll see them less and less. You need to be patient if you’d like this work though.
The upside to doing this is that there’s no need to lie to anyone about what it is that you’re doing. You’ll see the people you’d like to see less and you avoid hurting anyone’s feelings. It says a lot about someone if they see you working hard at what you love and they aren’t happy for you. Then again if you aren’t a patient person you could always be direct, so long as you don’t forget the most important thing…
The one reason why people react negatively when you let them go is due to your delivery. Quite often the reason you have for spending less and less time with someone can be completely valid, even to them. However, due to your delivery you end up being rude. Telling the truth isn’t your problem, it’s simply how you tell the truth that is. Those that advise you to be honest always leave out the part where you need to consider the feelings of the person with whom you’re speaking. Everyone is sensitive and if there’s one thing that people never forget it’ll always be how you made them feel. Therefore when it comes to how you deliver the truth to someone you need to make sure you’re being kind. Hopefully that’s something you value.
Being kind and considerate when it comes to people’s feelings is what determines whether those you let go take things offensively or are understanding. Seeking the ‘Perfect Circle’ doesn’t mean that you should ignore everyone else that doesn’t match your values. You can talk to someone from time to time and still not consider them part of your circle. Your ‘Perfect Circle’ is your own and everyone else has their own as well. The people you consider part of yours may consider you as part of theirs as well or they may not. It all depends on what they value and if your values meet at any point. Therefore, as much as it’s all about you when it comes to you it’s all about everyone else when it comes to everyone else. Remember that at all times.
Having read this, if you’re aware that you’d prefer being direct it’s best advisable that you pick up the book entitled How To Win Friends And Influence People by Dale Carnegie. It’ll show you the best way to communicate with people. For those that are more patient, you should enjoy improving at what interests you.